INDEX: Agoraphobia (includes Panic). Anger Management. Anxiety. Bipolar Disorder. Bullying. Depression. Depression in Others. Grief, and Mourning. Insomnia. Loneliness. OCD. Panic (see Agoraphobia). Procrastination. PTSD. Schizophrenia. Self Confidence. Self Esteem. Self Harm. Social Anxiety/Phobia. Stress. Tired/Lack Energy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ AGORAPHOBIA often occurs as a result of having had a panic attack in a public place, and not wanting to repeat that experience outside of a place where someone feels safe, which is usually at home, in a place where they feel exposed, and unable to get help quickly. Recommended reading: The Agoraphobia Workbook: A Comprehensive Program to End Your Fear of Symptom Attacks by Dr. Elke Zuercher-White and Dr. C. Alec Pollard, & Freedom From Agoraphobia by Mark Eisenstadt, & Master Your Panic and Take Back Your Life: Twelve Treatment Sessions to Conquer Panic, Anxiety and Agoraphobia (Master Your Panic & Take Back Your Life) by Denise F. Beckfield, from your bookstore, or amazon.com. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are on page 1, at 8m.com, below, about agoraphobia. Hypnotherapy:http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com Agoraphobia & http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com Remedy for Agoraphobia: CD or MP3 & http://www.instant-hypnosis.com Beat Agoraphobia.~~~ At the first sign of one, employ an ANTI PANIC ATTACK breathing technique. Advice from a clinical psychologist is to breathe in to the count of 3: (one thousand one; one thousand two; one thousand three) each takes around a second to say to yourself, in your mind, and out to the count of 3. Keep repeating this until the panic subsides, which will deal with the hyperventilation aspect. View http://deeplyrelax.com & www.deepsloweasy.com/html/intro.htm Note: the controlled breathing only helps with the symptoms, as do medications/herbal remedies. Address the underlying cause, which requires some form of therapy; see your-mental-health.weebly.com, below, re anxiety, on pages 1, h, & i. Page h shows the difference between panic, and anxiety attacks.Read: When Panic Attacks: The New, Drug-Free Anxiety Therapy That Can Change Your Life, by David D. Burns (2007), &Panic Attacks Workbook: A Guided Program for Beating the Panic Trickby David Carbonell, & How to Stop Anxiety & Panic Attacks: A Simple Guide to using a specific set of Techniques to Stop Panic Attacks, Agoraphobia, Social Phobia, Fear of Driving or Flying and Stress by Geert Verschaeve, & "Power Over Panic", by Bronwyn Fox, from your bookstore, or enter "panic attacks" in the searchbar at Amazon.com for more media. Some people recommend nettle tea, with a little honey. Others use Passionflower, Lavender tea, Lemon Balm, Chamomile, but use no milk or cream with herbal teas, or Valerian (caution: use it for 3 weeks at most!). Know how these affect you before driving, or doing anything dangerous, and it is far better to use the treatments, rather than relying on herbal remedies. Free online PANIC COURSE - www.panic-attacks.co.uk also available by email. See the section on panic attacks at www.mind.org.uk also Ebooklet form. They recommend letting a panic attack run its course, without doing anything to treat it, so you KNOW you will survive it. The usual maximum is 30 minutes, until symptoms begin to subside. Also see www.anxietypanic.com/signs.html and http://www.onestepatatime.com (chatroom, and one free email is allowed to their resident expert on joining [free] - more if a paid up member) and
www.medicinenet.com/panic_disorder/artic… and www.squidoo.com/controlpanicattack/modul… and http://www.anxietynetwork.com Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra, (a series of easy mental exercises only; no flexibility required) on page L at Weebly, b Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at: http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.htmlabout panic. Hypnotherapy: Quicker, cheaper, and more conveniently: http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com Perfect Partners: Stop Panic Attacks + Breathing Exercise, or http://www.instant-hypnosis.com Stop Panic Attacks. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ANGER MANAGEMENT: It has been shown that the self control developed by people who decide to use their non dominant hand transfers to situations involving rage, and anger. View: http://ezinearticles.com/?Releasing-Yourself-From-Reptilian-Responses-to-Conflict&id=4744553 Other options: Take a couple of deep breaths; fill the lower part of your lungs first, THEN the chest. If you can't deal with it by using one of the techniques, such as counting backwards from 20, to 1, (and prevent you from allowing yourself to become angry, in the first place) it is important to express that anger appropriately, at the time, and to the person who caused it, if possible, or immediately afterwards. If not, perhaps by walking away later, and bellowing your rage and/or frustration. In some situations, such as work, or school, it might be better to cover your mouth with a cupped hand, bandanna/handkerchief, or use the crook of your elbow, to muffle the sound. Some people find that it helps to journal those thoughts, and emotions soon afterwards.
Anger, which is repressed, rather than healthily expressed, tends to fester, and later may cause explosive fits of rage, or depression. Let yourself feel the burning energy of that anger, and visualise it, as vividly as possible, as a hot flame cleansing you. It can help to have someone you can talk to. For more physically inclined people, a punching bag, or hitting your pillow, can be an effective release mechanism: visualise, as vividly as you can, that you are striking back at the cause of that anger. "But next time, when you get mad, just remember this quote: 'Those who anger you, conquer you.' It's basically saying that when you give someone the power to make you mad, or let it get to you, it's like they're controlling you. When I realized that, it made me mad, so I try to control my anger and not let people see it. You can still control your anger without being walked all over. You just have to draw a line." Try saying to yourself, in your mind: "I am fire! I am ice!". Repeat for as long as it takes for you to calm down sufficiently. Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: (free) http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra, (no flexibility required) on page L at your-mental-health.weebly.com Qi Gong, Tai Chi, or regular yoga suits others better. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. It is free via the searchbar at http://www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" or www.tapping.com (13 free videos). Professional is best. - There is a version for use in public places, (you could claim to have a headache, as you employ the acupressure massage/tapping your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I sometimes make myself angry, I deeply and completely accept myself."
They will enable you to emotionally centre yourself, when practiced regularly, and can also help you become a calmer, more self controlled person, who is less influenced by the behaviour of others. Books: The Anger Workbook - a 13 step plan to help you. - Les Carter & Frank Minirth. - Minirth Meier Clinic Series, & Anger Management For Dummies. - W. Doyle. PhD. - Gentry, & "Feeling Good - the new mood therapy" by David D. Burns, (recommended) & Angry All The Time: An Emergency Guide to Anger Control by Ron Potter-Efron. Try your library, local bookstore, or www.amazon.com for these. Check out: http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/ 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either preferably seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html , where the above came from, and see page S. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ANXIETY: Limit "worrying time" to 30 - 45 mns, daily, possibly when you get home, or after your evening meal, but not too close to bedtime, after which, resolve firmly to refuse to worry again on that day. Understand that to do otherwise would be counterproductive to your mental health, and enjoyment of life. Having had your "worry time" for the day, you can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I?". It's important to regularly monitor, and deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, images, impulses, or emotions, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately. Technique For Re-Programming Negative Thoughts: When you notice something negative, such as: "I can't do this/ am never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so useless/such a loser?" or even an image, emotion, or a memory; recognise that it is being generated from the negative part of your mind. After identifying, and labelling it, visualise a large, red, flashing, "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. Try replacing a negative thought with a positive affirmation of your choice, like: "I am a unique individual, with my own set of skills, and good points", or "I may not be perfect, but I'm doing the best I can, right now".
Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or www.wikihow.com/Meditate and/or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. It is free via the searchbar at www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" www.tapping.com (13 free videos). Professional is best. There is a version for use in public places, (you can claim to have a headache, as you employ the acupressure massage/tapping on your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I have anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself." Herbal remedies, such as chamomile, passionflower, or St. John's wort, are often effective, but the idea is (as with anxiolytic medication) to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect. See http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/conditionsatod/a/Anxiety.htm Imagine, as vividly as you possibly can, that your concerns, anxieties, worries, fears, your self-recriminations, all the agonizing "I'm-so-Stupids"; every painful "I-can't-do-it", etc., are huge raging, hurtful bulls snorting and charging at you. You see them coming at you and you hold out your red matador's cape at arms length and simply let them charge right by. Every time they come at you, hold out your arm with the red cape and let them rage and snort and go right on past. A free E course in CBT for anxiety is at: http://ecouch.anu.edu.au/welcome 85% of people are suggestible, to some extent, so consider professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at: http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/i.html where this came from; see the rest.
Try your bookstore, Amazon.com, or BarnesAndNoble.com for: How to Control Your Anxiety before It Controls You, by Albert Ellis, & Self-Coaching: How to Heal Anxiety and Depression, Joseph J. Luciani Ph.D., & Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, by Edmund Bourne, & Natural Relief for Anxiety: Complementary Strategies for Easing Fear, Panic & Worry by Edmund J. Bourne, Arlen Brownstein, and Lorna Garano, & The 10 Best-Ever Anxiety Management Techniques: Understanding How Your Brain Makes You Anxious and What You Can Do to Change It by Margaret Wehrenberg, & Managing Anxiety. Kennerley, Helen., and/or "Calm : a proven four-step process designed specifically for women who worry" - Denise Marek, Hay House, c2006. and/or "Women who worry too much : how to stop worry & anxiety from ruining relationships, work & fun" - Holly Hazlett-Stevens. ~~~ Call your county/local mental health agency, to see what help they can provide. Sliding scale based psychological counselling is often available from Catholic counselling, the Methodist church, or Unitarian Universalists, and sometimes the United Way. You don't have to be a member. Google: "clinics; mhmr; (your location)" & "free clinics; (your location)" Also contact your local department of human services and apply for state health care. See http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/21/health/21patient.html?_r=2 I am also advised that it is sensible to contact your local social services department, and apply for adult medicaid, then find a doctor who accepts it. It can also be a good idea to talk about your problems with a social worker (local is best) via the free clinic, or Emergency Room at a public hospital, and also ask in the above places, as they may have their phone no. Try calling 211, or 411. The national no. is (202) 408 8600. Social workers can be a mine of useful information. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BIPOLAR DISORDER: A previous answer follows: Take the quiz, at http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/public/bipolardisorder/howtotell/self-testing.cfm if unsure, and if the results are positive, ensure you get an expert diagnosis from a mental health professional, not doctors, who are much better dealing with physical ailments, and don't diagnose complex disorders like bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and borderline personality disorder often enough to develop any real expertise. Bipolar disorder usually involves major mood swings, which occur without apparent cause, and often over many months, or a matter of years, rather than days, as with most people (unless rapid cycling). If you decide to use allopathy, (modern Western medicine) I recommend trying Lithium Carbonate, or Lithium Citrate (regular tests are necessary, for these) before trying the other mood stabilisers, but if you aren't good at taking medications regularly, drinking adequate water, and keeping up your salt intake, something else, such as Lamictal may suit you better. Check out "lithium" at http://www.drugs.com & http://crazymeds.us/ and always research medications first, (read, and keep the labels/information sheets) so you will be aware of the risks, and on the lookout for side effects. If I wasn't bipolar type 1, and wasn't overly troubled by hallucinations, or serious delusional states, I know I'd first try the orthomolecular, and Omega 3 fish oil supplements, vitamins, minerals; herbal remedies, and a mostly raw food diet, for around 6 months, to see if they were sufficient.
Even if not, they can be maintained, as complementary treatments, which may enable a reduction in the medication(s) ultimately required, with their risks, and side effects. Check out http://www.nutritional-healing.com.au/content/condition.php?category=neuro&condition=Bipolar+Disorder Note: St. John's wort has been known to trigger mania, or hypomania, as have antidepressants, and the two should never be combined, due to the risk of serotonin syndrome. I'd aso eat in accordance with my "nutritional type". Enter that term in the searchbar at http://www.mercola.com (book), or a 20 question quiz is via http://www.naturalhealthcoach.com/tools If not considerably improved, after several months, consult your primary mental health care provider; you may be one of those who need medications to prevent this progressive illness from getting even worse. If bipolar type 1, an antipsychotic medication may also be needed. Everyone should take the Omega 3 supplements, or preferably "krill oil" for its other health benefits: use the searchbar at Mercola.com . Some people refuse medication, using supplements, and a selective, mostly raw food diet (I do not recommended trying this, if bipolar 1, unless you aren't overly troubled by hallucinations, or serious delusional states, and have a mind disciplined enough to recognise them and act sensibly). Don't use medications and supplements together, without medical advice, except for Omega 3, which is safe.
Maintaining the treatments for the depressive phase (if not using, or using minimal mood stabilisers) may well reduce the impact of the depressive phase, when it recurs. Considerably more is on the main page about bipolar disorder, at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/c.html and view page 3. BOOKS: Healing Depression & Bipolar Disorder Without Drugs, by Gracelyn Guyol, & Break the Bipolar Cycle: A Day-by-Day Guide to Living with Bipolar Disorderby Elizabeth Brondolo and Xavier Amador, & Bipolar Disorder: The Ultimate Guideby Sarah Owen and Amanda Saunders, & Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Bipolar Disorder, Second Editionby Monica Ramirez Basco Ph.D. and A. John Rush M.D., and the other best ones, from your bookstore, or www.amazon.com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BULLYING: Enter "bullying" in the searchbar at www.wikihow.com DECIDE not to be a victim. Take a self defence course, then a martial art, like Kung Fu, or Tae Kwon Do. Go to a gym; pump iron, and eat a healthy, high protein diet to help build muscle mass. Warn bullies first, and never start trouble; you have a legal right to use REASONABLE FORCE to defend youself. If they are the aggressor, and physically stronger, your right to an appropriate response is enhanced. Hypnotism is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind. 85% of people are suggestible, to some extent, so consider professional hypnotherapy, or hypnosisdownloads.com has ones on coping with bullying, and verbal self defence you may be interested in clicking on. Partners: Verbal Self Defense + Assertiveness Training. "Develop advanced verbal self-defense skills. Have you noticed some people tie you up in knots by what they say to you - and the way they say it? Do you ever feel helpless and angry that you can't make your point in these situations? If you often feel verbally assaulted then some verbal self defense skills will reverse those situations for good. Words can be used as weapons. You may know someone who uses the machine gun technique - asking you question after question without giving you a chance to answer. Or maybe you are subjected to someone who makes snide sarcastic jokes at your expense. Perhaps they are 'good with words' and make you feel verbally clumsy or inept. Learn verbal self defense skills and astonish your attacker. Verbal self defense isn't about becoming angry, shouting or being aggressive. There are a few simple rules to verbal self defense that will allow you to defend yourself with dignity. Verbal Self Defense will teach you these key rules and train your brain to stay relaxed in those tricky situations, ensuring you can respond and not freeze or clam up. This is essential, because it's easy to know what you should say during times of verbal assault but it's another thing having the presence of mind to defend yourself verbally."
Google: "humor; insults" Memorize several. Never repeat one; learn new ones, or make them up. "Better hurry up; you're going to be late for A55HOLE CLA55" & "I see your mother is still (cutting your hair/dressing you); does she still tie your shoelaces as well?", and so on. When you consistently don't respond in the way they desire, and prove yourself a difficult target, they are much more likely to avoid you, and find someone easier, and you will feel much better about yourself for having stood up to them. View: http://www.bullyonline.org/schoolbully/ Workplace bullying: see http://www.workplacebullying.org/ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DEPRESSION: Identify the cause: http://curezone.com/dis/read.asp?C0=108 and if applicable; http://sfhelp.org/gwc/wounds.htm Was there a triggering event? If so, it is probably reactive (situational) depression: counselling, psychotherapy, or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is indicated. Or, was it a more gradual thing, with no apparent cause? (a nutritional deficiency, hypothyroidism, environmental toxicity, or reactions to some medications, such as Advil etc., becomes more likely). St. John's Wort helps most people; tolerance doesn't develop, and the few side effects don't occur often, and even then are normally not severe (neither antidepressants, nor the wort, nor supplements should be relied on as a sole treatment). It doesn't cause sleeping problems, or weight change, and usually takes at least 2, and generally 4 - 6 weeks to become effective, but can sometimes work quicker than antidepressants. See http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10759336?dopt=Abstract A recent, independent German double blind study showed it to be as effective as a commonly prescribed antidepressant, in cases of major depression, with far fewer side effects, and those were generally better tolerated, with a lower rate of discontinuation. Unlike antidepressants, where sexual dysfunction is a common side effect, it is far less of a problem with SJW. A multidimensional approach to treating depression without medication follows. All except for no. (7.) are safe to use with medication, but not SJW, because of interactions, and it's sensible to check out anything else first, like supplements, such as SAMe, 5-htp, or L-phenylalanine, with your doctor. (1.) Take at least 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily: (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or its FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it! In the winter months, if not getting sufficient daily exposure to strong light, see http://drbenkim.com/vitamin-d-facts.htm & http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2008/12/16/my-one-hour-vitamin-d-lecture-to-clear-up-all-your-confusion-on-this-vital-nutrient.aspx Go to a doctor and ask for a 25(OH)D, also called 25-hydroxyvitamin D, blood test. When you get the results, don’t follow the typical “normal” reference range, as these are too low. The OPTIMAL value that you’re looking for is 45-52 ng/ml (115-128 nmol/l)". The company which tests your levels has to be one of those using the correct form of test, and this topic is addressed via the searchbar at Mercola.com - "vitamin D3; testing". Also take a vitamin B complex which is certified as being 100% of natural origin; the deficiency in vitamin B9 (folate, or folic acid) that most depressed people have, is known to cause depression. Around 30% - 40% of depressed people have low vitamin B12 levels.
(2.) Work up slowly to at least 20 minutes of daily exercise, or 30 - 60 mns, 5 times weekly in daytime, outside. Too much exercise can cause stress; unwanted when dealing with depression. (3.) Occupational therapy (keeping busy allows little time for unproductive introspection, and keeps mental activity out of less desirable areas of the brain). (4.) Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: (free) http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra, (no flexibility required) on page L at Weebly.com, below, or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. It is free via the searchbar at www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" - Professional is best. There is a version for use in public places, (you could claim to have a headache, as you use the acupressuremassage/tapping on your temples. (5.) Initially, at least, some form of psychotherapy or counselling; later, perhaps either Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy, (a free E course in it, which may well reduce the time needed in therapy, as should *, & ** is at: http://ecouch.anu.edu.au/welcome ) or Rational Emotive Behavio(u)ral Therapy for up to 6 months. (6.) Maintain a mood chart, and daily activities schedule**. (7.) As options, if desired, either a known, effective herbal remedy, such as St. John's wort, (get a German variety, if possible; local ones may vary in effectiveness. Perika, Jarsin, and Kira brands have been recommended as being effective. Take with a meal), Supplements, such as SAMe, 5-htp, L-phenylalanine: see: http://www.indepression.com/depression-natural-remedy.html (from vitamin and health food stores, some supermarkets have old/inferior types, or mail order: Google: " ... ; supplies"), St. John's Wort, etc. 80% of people in the Western world have low magnesium levels; which can cause depression.
Try pharmacies/supermarkets for the magnesium supplement types at http://www.real-depression-help.com/magnesium-for-depression.html Low levels of calcium, and potassium can cause depression. A quiz is at http://psychcentral.com/depquiz.htm if positive, see a doctor. Have your blood tested, and correct any deficiencies, preferably through improved nutrition. An improvement can be noticed in as little as a week, if a deficiency is the cause. Use sea salt, http://www.naturalnews.com/025883.html as many people are iodine deficient, adversely affecting thyroid function. Read: "Lift your mood now." by * John D Preston, Psy.D., & "Feeling Good - the new mood therapy" ** by David D. Burns, M.D., & Self-Coaching: How to Heal Anxiety and Depression, Joseph J. Luciani Ph.D., from your bookstore, or Amazon.com. Most people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or see http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/b.html and see page 3. IF TAKING ANTIDEPRESSANTS: I suggest that you check out www.drugs.com & www.rxlist.com and wean off, in accordance with http://www.theroadback.org/workbook.htm and begin the core treatments below immediately, and the herbal remedies, or OTHER supplements, like SAM-e, 5HTP, or L-phenylalanine, when below 50% weaning dosage. Most doctors are only taught: "antidepressants, therapy, and if resistant, ECT". ~~~ Take folate (vitamin B9) in the form of a multivitamin (400 to 800 micrograms). St. John's wort should NOT be taken with prescription antidepressants, birth control pills, protease inhibitors for HIV, theophylline, warfarin, digoxin, reserpine, cyclosporine, or loperamide.Identify the cause, if possible.
IF TAKING ANTIDEPRESSANTS: I suggest that you check out www.drugs.com & www.rxlist.com and wean off, in accordance with http://www.theroadback.org/workbook.htm and begin the core treatments below immediately, and the herbal remedies, or OTHER supplements, like SAM-e, 5HTP, or L-phenylalanine, when below 50% weaning dosage. Most doctors are only taught: "antidepressants, therapy, and if resistant, ECT". ~~~ Take folate (vitamin B9) in the form of a multivitamin (400 to 800 micrograms). St. John's wort should NOT be taken with prescription antidepressants, birth control pills, protease inhibitors for HIV, theophylline, warfarin, digoxin, reserpine, cyclosporine, or loperamide. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ GRIEF: My sincere condolences go to anyone suffering grief from any cause. Some suggestions, and resources: See: http://www.cmha.ca/bins/content_page.asp?cid=284-1007-1110-1111-1144&lang=1 Call: The Grief Recovery Institute (U.S.A.) 1-800-445-4808, or Hospice (phone book). Email [email protected] Chatrooms and forums: http://www.chatmag.com/topics/health/grief.html & http://talkingminds.15.forumer.com & http://messageboards.ivillage.com Other websites: www.griefnet.org & www.griefcounselor.org & http://www.recover-from-grief.com/grief-websites.html & www.helpguide.org & http://www.groww.com/ & www.mental-health-abc.com & www.boblivingstone.com/?q=node30 & www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk There is a grief support group at: http://dailystrength.org Also try Groups, at Myspace.com and Yahoo.com & Google.com At www.mind.org.uk type "grief" in the taskbar, and enter. Helping others grieve, and helping children grieve are some topics at: http://www.crisiscounseling.com/TraumaLoss/1TraumaLossGrief.htm Understand that there are often several stages of grief. Those stages are: Denial: The initial stage: "It can't be happening." Anger: "Why ME? It's not fair?!" (either referring to oneself, anybody, or anything perceived, rightly or wrongly, as "responsible") Bargaining: "Just let me live to see my son graduate." Depression: "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?" Acceptance: "It's going to be alright. Growth: Grief is a chance for personal growth. For many people, it may eventually lead to renewed energy to invest in new activities and new relationships. Some people seek meaning in their loss and get involved in causes or projects that help others. They may find a new compassion in themselves as a result of the pain they have suffered. They may become more sensitive to others, thus enabling richer relationships. Others find new strength and independence they never knew they had. After the loss, they find new emotional resources that had not been apparent beforeKübler-Ross originally applied these stages to any form of catastrophic personal loss (job, income, freedom). This also includes the death of a loved one and divorce.
Kübler-Ross also claimed these steps do not necessarily come in order, nor are they all experienced by all patients, though she stated a person will always experience at least two. See www.amazon.com for books on the various stages. Professional advice is to set aside 5 - 10 mns daily, and during that time, focus on all the memories and feelings involved. If you are sad; cry. If you are angry; punch a pillow. At the end of that time, go on with other things, and if such thoughts or memories come to mind, just write them down in a notebook for the next day's session. This may well accelerate the grieving process. After a while, consider making a photoalbum/scrapbook and/or a shrine, in remembrance, and set aside; say; one day every month, perhaps on a significant date, (for example; the 17th, or the second thursday) on which to reflect. Many religious organisations offer counselling, or you may feel more comfortable with a therapist, to express your thoughts, and feelings. Journalling may help in this. Celebrate that life; be thankful for the experience, and remember the good times. Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm it enables awareness, and a way of being, without emotional suffering, and helps you through the more difficult times in life. Try your bookstore, or Amazon.com for: Redemption of the Shattered: A Teenager's Healing Journey Through Sandtray Therapy by Bob Livingstone LCSW Livingstone, B. (2002), boblivingstone.com ~~~ Beyond Grief: A guide for recovering from the death of a loved one; and: Men and grief: A guide for men surviving the death of a loved one, New Harbinger Productions Inc. 5674 Shattock Ave, Oakland, CA 94609 Phone: 1-800-784-6273 ~~~ James, J. W. & Friedman, R. (1998). The Grief Recovery Handbook, Collins. ~~~ Grollman, E. (1995). Living when a Loved One has Died, Beacon Press. ~~~ Livingstone, B. (Planned August, 2007)
A Music I No Longer Heard: The Early Death of a Parent by Leslie Simon and Jan Johnson Drantell & The Body-Mind-Soul Solution: Healing Emotional Pain through Exercise, Pegasus Books. Tatelbaum, J. The Courage to Grieve. Creative Living, Recovery and Growth through Grief. New York: Harper & Row. (1980). ~~~ Roth, Deborah, ed. Stepping Stones to Grief Recovery. Santa Monica: IBS Press.(1987). ~~~ Coping with Grief by Mal McKissock and Dianne McKissock, ABC Books & Audio. 2001 Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html Hypnosisdownloads.com has: Dealing with Grief & Death of a Parent & Death of a Child & Death Of A Partner, & http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com - Adjusting to Loss CD - MP3. ~~~ www.griefhaven.org LOSS OF CHILD ~~~ 35 Ways to Help a Grieving Child, The Dougy Centre for Grieving Children, 1999 & The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst and Erik Blegvad (& VHS tape). ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ INSOMNIA: Exercise, preferably 6 hours before, but not within 2 hours of bedtime. Have a warm bath, or shower, an hour before bedtime, then a glass of very warm milk, possibly with Horlicks, or one of the herbal teas, below, and use dimmer lighting. Your bedroom should be very dark, with the lights out, and a good sleeping temperature is 70 degrees Fahrenheit, or 19 degrees Centigrade. Put your mind in a position where it wants to shut itself off, and sleep. View http://www.umm.edu/sleep/relax_tech.htm The progressive muscle relaxation, http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing is very easily learned; guided imagery, or mindfulness breathing http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody… is known to be effective, or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate Give the EFT a tryout. It is free via the searchbar at http://www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" or www.tapping.com (13 free videos). Repeat to yourself: "Even though I currently have a sleep disorder, I deeply and completely accept myself." (or choose your own wording) while you use the acupressure massage/tapping. Find out which works best for you, in the daylight hours, so you will be prepared, come bedtime. For many people, a good idea is to develop a set "wind down" routine for the last hour before bedtime, so your subconscious mind learns that it is time to put thinking aside, and prepare for mindfulness, (awareness, without cogitation/purposeful thought) or the EFT, in preparation for sleep.
The idea with mindfulness is to not even think about sleeping: just drift off, naturally, during exercising those techniques. Avoid TV, computer, or anything exciting in this hour, although reading a BORING! book is a good idea. Experiment, to find which combination works best for you. No coffee, tea, or other caffeine within 6 hrs of bedtime! Try a cup of chamomile herbal tea, an hour before bedtime. Others may prefer Sleepytime, by Celestial Seasonings, Relax, Be Sleepy, or valerian root (valerian "hangovers" possible), etc., from supermarket tea, or health food aisles. Milk, or cream should not be used with herbal tea. Get up and do something, like read a book, if you can't sleep within 20 mns. Personally, I prefer to use word/phrase repetition for a short time, changing over to mindfulness breathing; however, you may well find another method more effective. The following EMDR variant came from a book on treating insomnia for the depressed; I use it every night, and it is well worth trying. It seems to reduce distractions during the mindfulness relaxation methods, so I use it first. Keeping your head still, move your eyes first to the far left, then far right, and repeat this another 19 times. Each full sweep should take around a second. If you like, you can either subvocalise, or repeat: "one one thousand, two one thousand, three one thousand ... up to twenty.
After this, allow your body to go limp, and relax for a short time. Then repeat the whole exercise, limpness, and relaxation twice. This may well be all you need. Others may require another round of the above. Before beginning the EMDR variant, I take a whiff of lavender essential oil in both nostrils; some people prefer a drop, or two on their pillow. This provides a strong cue to the subconscious mind to prepare for sleep. 85% of people are suggestible, to some extent, so consider professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html Try the free sleep aid at: http://www.soundsleeping.com/ You could try melatonin (pharmacies) for a few nights only; more can interfere with the brain's natural production of it.~~~ http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com Fall Asleep Fast, Drift Off To Sleep, Sleep and Dream, or Sleep Like a Child, or http://www.instant-hypnosis.com Beat Insomnia, Quiet Blissful Sleep, Enjoy Deep Sleep, or Restorative Healing Sleep. ~~~ Get bright light, soon after arising, to reset your circadian rhythmn, and move your bedtime 30 - 60 mns earlier, daily, until approaching regular hours. Stabilise your sleep habits. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LONELINESS: Join mutual interest groups, clubs, associations, sports, gym, & take up classes in yoga, t'ai chi, Pilates, art, self defence, aerobics, creative writing, or ceramics, etc. Consider volunteering, even from home, at first, as a means of changing your focus from your feelings of loneliness, and will help stop useless introspection. Approach people with sensible questions, and find out what they're like, and, for example: "What sort of things are you interested in, Obediah? I like archery, and train spotting, but have recently learned not to combine the two." (joking) Next: "I'm from Argedargedah, in Australia, Obediah, Where are you from, originally?" (BTW, It's on the map!) On volunteering outside the home, you will come into contact with supportive people, and receive positive feedback for your efforts, which will be obviously appreciated, and it will give added purpose to your life, as well as helping others. It can also be an indication of the presence of depression, or dysthymia, and there are quizzes for this via http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/public/depression/howtotell/selftesting.cfm and effective treatments are shown at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/3.html & http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/b.html Check out: http://www.webofloneliness.com & http://dailystrength.org Overcoming Loneliness is a 21 mns download available from http://www.meditainment.com/search/ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ O.C.D. A quiz for the presence of OCD is at http://www.ocdla.com/OCDtest.html OCD is an anxiety spectrum disorder, and the obsessions and compulsions are a way of avoiding, or coping with it, so; treat the underlying anxiety effectively, replacing your habit with the EFT, below, or (hopefully only temporarily) something more socially acceptable, like using worry beads, stress ball, electronic palm held game, or stringing beads, etc. It's important to regularly monitor, and deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, images, impulses, or emotions, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately. Technique For Re-Programming Negative Thoughts: When you notice something negative, such as: "I can't do this/ am never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser?" or even an image, emotion, or a memory; recognise that it is being generated from the negative part of your mind. Having identified and labelled it, visualise a large, red, flashing, "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary.
Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: (free) http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra Tai Chi, yoga, or Qi Gong suits others better. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. Use the searchbar at http://www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" and/or see the 13 free videos at http://www.tapping.com - There is a version for use in public places, (if anyone asks, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I sometimes suffer from obsessions/compulsions, I deeply and completely accept myself." Herbal remedies, such as St. John's wort, are often effective, but the idea is (as with anxiolytic medication) to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect.
A free E course in CBT for anxiety is at: http://ecouch.anu.edu.au/welcomeBooks: Coping With OCD: Practical Strategies for Living Well With Obsessive-compulsive Disorder by Bruce M., Ph.D. Hyman and Troy Dufrene, & Overcoming Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder: Client Manual: A Behavioral and Cognitive Protocol for the Treatment of OCD (Best Practices Series) by Gail Steketee, & Confronting the Bully of OCD: Winning Back Our Freedom One Day at a Time by Linda Maran, from your bookstore, or amazon.com. Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind; view http://myfavoriteinterests.com/hypnosis/ about what it is, and isn't. 85% of people are suggestible to some degree; 15% - 20% highly so, and 15% - 20% aren't much at all, so you could either preferably seek professional hypnotherapy, or, if not an option, more along such lines is at: http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html and read page F, where this came from. ~~~ Hypnotherapy:http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com Conquer Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (ocd) Hypnosis CD or MP3, or: http://www.instant-hypnosis.com Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), & Quiet the Voices Within, or: http://www.hypnosisdownloads.comStop Obsessive Thoughts , OCD Treatment , Stop Obsessive Compulsive Cleaning , Stop Obsessive Checking,Improve Impulse Control, & Overcome Fear and Anxiety, or: (free) at: http://www.freehypnosistreatment.com - anxiety. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PANIC: See AGORAPHOBIA, where both (often related) subjects are addressed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PROCRASTINATION: In: "Feeling Good - the new mood therapy" by David D. Burns, the author provides 14 methods for coping with various aspects of procrastination. Read: The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play by Neil Fiore, & The Practicing Mind: Bringing Discipline and Focus Into Your Life by Thomas M. Sterner, & Awaken Your Strongest Self: Break Free of Stress, Inner Conflict, and Self-Sabotage by Neil Fiore, & (for younger people) See You Later, Procrastinator! (Get It Done) (Laugh & Learn series) by Elizabeth Verdick and Pamela Espeland, from your bookstore, or enter "procrastination" in the searchbar at Amazon.com for other books, and media. Counterintuitively, to some extent, motivation follows action, and not the other way around, like a pump which needs priming, or a bonfire that needs to be be lit, before going. The diagram goes as follows: INITIAL ACTION > MOTIVATION > MORE ACTION > MORE MOTIVATION > MORE ACTION, and so on. So: MAKE A START, even if only for a minute. We tend to view tasks in their entirety, making them appear huge. I find that it helps to break it down into readily achievable stages, and promise myself a small reward, on the completion of each, and a bigger one, once finalised. Another tactic is to promise yourself that you will make a start, and just do 5, or 10 minutes. If, at the end of that time, you feel like continuing, do so.
Otherwise, take a short break, and come back to it, later. It's making the start, that's often the hardest part, and once that is done, everything else often just seems to fall into place, possibly because your unconscious mind is using parallel procession, and continuing to consider it, during the breaks. Set a timer, or alarm, to remind you when your next break is due, and don't put off resuming it for too long. To put it off is to create a disincentive to returning to the task, and is procrastination in another form. Remember similar previous successes. Consider what will happen if you don't get it done. If you have a deadline for a project; mark the date a few days before the due date, and then count the days back to today. Estimate and divide the work and time over that timeframe, so that by the date due, you'll have completed it, by following the schedule/map outline of the project that you created. That gives you back the power and the control over your life and timetable, and extra time, if needed, as often happens. Folders, shelves, and boxes, clearly labelled, and assigning a place for everything, then getting into the habit (it takes 30 - 40 repetitions to establish a habit, for most people) of putting things in their respective places will make it much easier, in the long term, and help you in other ways, as well (having places for your keys, credit cards, wallet/purse, cellular mobile phone, P.D.A., etc., so you never misplace them). Colour coding can sometimes be of additional benefit in quickly locating something. The benefits will carry over into other areas of your life, too, such as work.
View: http://www.stevepavlina.com/articles/ove… & http://psychologytoday.com/rss/pto-20030… & http://depression.about.com/cs/selfhelp/… & http://www.scotthyoung.com/blog/2007/05/… & http://www.studygs.net/attmot3.htm & http://www.how-to-study.com/study-skills/en/studying/36/procrastination/ & http://www.studytips.org/procrastination.htm & at http://www.43things.com/things/view/225/… the topic of laziness is also addressed. Enter "procrastination" in the searchbar at www.mercola.com The time and effort you put into overcoming procrastination now will be repaid countless times over. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html about procrastination. Quicker, cheaper, and more conveniently: Perfect Partners: Overcome Procrastination + Improving Concentration and Focus Hypnosis Downloads http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/ & Perfect Partners: Do It Now + Overcome Procrastination and at http://www.instant-hypnosis.com/ Stop Procrastination ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PTSD: There is a quiz for the presence of P.T.S.D., via http://psychcentral.com Some of the symptoms include "flashbacks", hypervigilance, sleep disorders, especially nightmares, and just staring blankly. View the http://1-800-therapist.com/ & http://www.metanoia.org/choose/ websites, and Google:"therapists; EMDR; (your location)" or use the phone book, and/or various associations for psychiatrists and psychologists, to find the nearest one using EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy). In EMDR, a therapist will ask you to revisit a traumatic event and remember the feelings, negative thoughts, or memories associated with it. While you are doing this, the therapist may hold up two fingers about eighteen inches from your face and move them from side to side. You may be asked to track the movement of the therapist’s fingers with your eyes. As you concentrate on the traumatic event during therapy, you are trying to bring its memory to life. The mental imagery you are able to conjure up during the therapy session is then processed, aided by your eye movements, facilitating the processing of painful memories, enabling some of the powerful emotional states involved to be discharged to some degree, and helping to achieve resolution and a state involving less painful emotions. EMDR has 8 stages. Professional EMDR is always much preferable. It can be completely cured.
Sometimes, a beta blocker, such as propranolol, or atenolol is administered prior to being asked to recount the traumatic event, reducing the emotional charge associated with it, as it is re-recorded in your memory (which has been shown to be plastic, at least to some extent, with many people). I suggest trying something milder, such as valerian, (some people get "valerian hangovers") or "Tension Tamer", or chamomile herbal tea (no milk, or cream!) from supermarket tea, vitamin, or health food aisles, at least at first, to see if sufficient, otherwise (SHORT TERM ONLY, as a risk minimisation strategy - potentially ADDICTIVE) a benzodiazapene, like Xanax. Check out medications first at: www.drugs.com and www.rxlist.com/ If unable to afford it, or to locate one nearby, contact the county/local mental health agency: any therapy on offer may prove helpful, particularly if combined with appropriate medication. Contact your county/local mental health agency, and find out what help they can offer. (U.S.A.) Try phoning 211, or 411, and Google: "clinics; mhmr; (your city); (your state)" Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. Use the searchbar at www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" and/or see the 13 free videos at www.tapping.com & http://www.emofree.com/freevideos.aspx for PTSD.
There is a version for use in public places, (if anyone asks, you can claim to have a headache, as employ the acupressure massage/tapping on your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I suffer from PTSD, I deeply and completely accept myself." Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is also recommended, and has been used successfully, with PTSD. Some people, however, may benefit more from psychotherapy, or counselling, at least until they are some way along the path to wellness, and feeling psychologically robust enough for the harsher CBT. A free E course in it, which can help reduce the time spent in therapy sessions, is at: http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome Use a relaxation method daily, like http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/q.html about PTSD, where this came from. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SCHIZOPHRENIA: There are screening quizzes for schizophrenia at http://psychcentral.com and http://www.schizophrenia.com If indicated, print the completed one(s), and take to a doctor, but ensure that you are expertly diagnosed by a mental health professional. If you consult a clinical psychologist, ensure you get a written copy of any test performed. View: http://www.schizophrenia.com/treatments.htm and http://www.nutritional-healing.com.au/content/condition.phpcondition=Schizophrenia
Read: "Building Self-Confidence for Dummies" by Kate Burton and Brinley Platts, & Self-Confidence: The Remarkable Truth of Why a Small Change Can Make a Big Differenceby Paul McGee, & The Confidence Plan: How to Build a Stronger Youby Timothy E. Ursiny, from your bookstore, or amazon.com. Learn to forgive yourself for your past mistakes, and failures, or inadequacies. Treat each person you meet as if she or he is truly important. (You'll be amazed how this works). Look the other person straight in the eye, or on the bridge of their nose. Train yourself to notice something you like or find attractive in the person. Listen! Teach yourself to develop good listening skills. Learn a way to remember the other person's name. Make up a little story, perhaps. If in doubt, simply ask for the name again 2 or 3 sentences into the conversation. An exercise which can help you is called: "Act as if." When in a social situation, act as if you are confident, and outgoing. Talk more, smile at everyone; ask questions, speak in a normal or excited tone. Watch some of your outgoing peers, and imitate their social behavior. Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit.
The first step in becoming more confident is to accept and like yourself. Make a list of all your good points, strengths, and achievements. Put it somewhere so you can easily refer to it, from time to time; perhaps on the refrigerator door, or print it; (large typeface, or capitalise) have it framed, and place in your bedroom, or in a position of prominence, such as on the television, or lounge room wall. By doing this, you are reminding yourself that you, too, have praise-worthy qualities like others. You will like, and feel confident about yourself after this. Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/1.html Quicker, cheaper, and more conveniently: http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com has many: Building Self Confidence, & Building Self Esteem, or http://www.meditainment.com SEARCHBAR: enter: "Self Confidence", or http://www.instant-hypnosis.com has Super Self Confidence, Be a Great Listener, & Self Esteem + Self Confidence, or http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com has: Self Esteem, & Self Confidence - hypnosis CD or tape CD - MP3 & Self Esteem - Forest, or Beach - CD, or tape. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SELF ESTEEM: Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: (free) http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra, (no flexibility required) on page L at Weebly.com, below. Qi Gong, Tai Chi, or regular yoga suits others better. They will enable you to emotionally centre yourself, when practiced regularly, and can also help you become a person who is less influenced by the words and behaviour of others. Learn them at least a few hours apart, and preferably on different days, in the morning, or early afternoon. Use the one you find most effective. A minimum of 10 mns is recommended; 15 is better, and 20 is ideally preferred. Learn them at least a few hours apart, and preferably on different days, in the morning, or early afternoon. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. Use the searchbar at http://www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists", or www.tapping.com (13 free videos). Professional is best.
There is a version for use in public places, (if you want to, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I currently have low self esteem, I deeply and completely accept myself." I have recently encountered the opinion that, just as it is important to build a house on a solid foundation, so it is with self esteem. Learn to forgive yourself for your past mistakes, and failures, or inadequacies. Accept that you, too are just a human being, with the frailties, insecurities, and tendency to err, occasionally, that the rest of us have. That is the beginning of self love, self acceptance, and self esteem. Regularly monitor your internal monologue (self talk): write down the negative ones: "I'm really ugly" and then the converse: "I'm fairly good looking", and next time you become aware that you are thinking the former, visualise, as vividly as possible, a big "STOP!!!" sign, and/or a stern faced person wagging a finger at you, and deliberately repeat 5 times, either aloud, in a big voice, if alone, or subvocally (to yourself, in your mind), the converse affirmation. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary.
Volunteer, even from home, at first, to provide a solid basis in reality for the daily affirmations: "I am a good person, who is valued by my community, because I... (insert activity here).." Google: "volunteer from home" Edit one page of an Ebook daily, at: http://www.gutenberg.org/wiki/Main_Page Did you know that you can help us produce ebooks by proof-reading just one page a day? Go to: Distributed Proofreaders see: http://www.gutenberg.org/wiki/Category:Volunteering Write letters in support of prisoners of conscience, for Amnesty International. Many innocent people, whose only reason for incarceration was that they were a thorn in the side of a repressive government, have had their release secured as a result of a flood of letters, from all over the world. Also see http://www.supportpath.com/ and http://www.neoteen.org ELSEWHERE: Help for 2 hours per fortnight, at Meals on Wheels. Other suggestions are: As a literacy volunteer, animal shelter, Red cross/crescent, soup kitchen, Greenpeace, nursing home/hospital, Habitat for Humanity, United Way, or as a Big Sister, or Big Brother. Make a list of all your good points, strengths, and achievements. Put it somewhere so you can easily refer to it, from time to time; perhaps on the refrigerator door, or print it; (large typeface, or capitalise) have it framed, and place in your bedroom, or in a position of prominence, such as on the television, or lounge room wall.
Consider taking up amateur abstract, impressionist, or surrealist art, clay modelling, designing and/or making fashion, or jewellery. Journalling those thoughts, and feelings, poetry, or story writing are some more options.No-one ever has to see them, but you may well surprise yourself at how good you become, with experience. Even if not, and you are totally dissatisfied with every single effort, it will still have served its purpose. No-one ever has to see them, but you may well surprise yourself at how good you become, with experience. Even if not, and you are totally dissatisfied with every single effort, it will still have served its purpose. Use that emotional energy, and allow it expression, through an activity other than self harm. Keep occupied; multitask, like listening to music while surfing the 'net. Join a support group, such as http://dailystrength.org and go there when you feel the urge to self harm. Books: Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, & Distress Tolerance (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey C. Wood, and Jeffrey Brantley, & Self-Harm: A Psychotherapeutic Approach by Fiona Gardner, & Alive and Cutting: A teenager's journey in therapy to understanding her self-harm by Richard Bryant-Jefferies, & Scars That Wound, Scars That Heal: A Journey Out of Self Injury (Live Free) & Stopping the Pain: A Workbook for Teens Who Cut & Self-Injure by Lawrence E. Shapiro & Understanding Self-Injury: A Workbook for Adults by Robin Connors and Kristy Trautmann, from your bookstore, or enter "self harm" at Amazon.com for more media. Because of the association between Borderline Personality Disorder and self harm, view http://www.essortment.com/all/borderlineperso_rnmc.htm and pages G & X at Weebly, below.
It is a good idea to have an accountability partner; someone you trust and is available anytime, so when you feel like you want to self harm, you call them and talk about why. Join a support group, such as http://dailystrength.org and go there when you feel the urge to self harm. Advice from an experienced psychotherapist is here: http://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ApJxmFKJU10eaPMH4ZfeYX7g5gt.;_ylv=3?qid=20070801184649AA9iH1b&show=7#profile-info-iUKGAgRjaa 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either preferably seek professional hypnotherapy, or, if not an option, more along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/a.html with alternatives, self harm hotlines, chat sites & forums. If self harming from depression, see pages 3, and B, at Weebly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SOCIAL ANXIETY: Go to: http://ecouch.anu.edu.au/welcome Select "social anxiety" for free Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy. An exercise which may help you is called "Act as If." When you are in a social situation, act as if you are outgoing. Talk more; smile at people, ask questions, speak in a normal or excited tone, not a meek tone. Watch some of your more outgoing peers, and imitate the style of their social behavior. (PRETEND that you are an ACTOR, PLAYING a PART). Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence, and begin to see yourself as socially normal, not shy. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit. A form of therapy is to go somewhere that nobody knows you, and deliberately make an utter fool of yourself: put on a paper hat, and yell out: "I'm queen/king of America!", or something else ridiculous, (make up your own - have some fun, safely) then get back in the taxi, (warn the driver of your intentions, first) or car, and leave. People will point, and say: "Look at that idiot". Or, possibly in the company of a friend, or family member, on a different train, or bus route to your regular one, call out the names, or numbers of all the stops. It will teach you that, although it isn't actually pleasant, (EXPECT MODERATE DISCOMFORT/EMBARRASSMENT) you will survive; be stronger for the experience, and the next time (should you need to repeat this type of therapy) will be considerably easier. Remember: "A fear avoided is a fear strengthened; a fear faced is a fear reduced." Regard it as your final test: once you have accomplished it, the barrier will be broken; just don't go too far, the other way! Learn to laugh at yourself, and give a big, cheesy grin when others see you do something foolish, as we all do, occasionally. It is endearing, if you don't do it too often. Use positive affirmations: for example: "I am very likable and other people feel comfortable around me".
Write down all of your self limiting beliefs; then write down, or print, in large type/capitalisation, the positive counter of them, (exact opposite) and repeat them and imprint them into your mind. Put it in a prominent position, where you will see it regularly. Most importantly: Force yourself to approach somebody and initiate some sort of communication. Start out small by asking the time, or directions and gradually go bigger. Although there are anti-anxiety medications (anxiolytics) available, these come with risks, and the possibility of side effects, habituation, even addiction, and withdrawal problems, and are unsuitable for young people. Try having a cup of "Tension Tamer", etc., or make some at home, and cool, then bottle, and drink as needed. C(h)amomile tea tastes better. As with all herbal/green teas, use lemon/lime, and/or a little sweetener (NOT ARTIFICIAL!!!) but no cream, or milk. Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, from health food stores. Valerian has also been recommended, but some people experience "valerian hangovers". Ensure you know how you react to it, before doing something potentially dangerous, like going out on the roads. The idea is to use the above products like water wings, to provide initial, short term support, while you become proficient in those techniques. Use a relaxation method daily, like http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or http://www.wikihow.com Meditate or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you. It is free via the searchbar at www.mercola.com "EFT" & "EFT therapists" or www.tapping.com (13 free videos). Professional is best. - There is a version for use in public places, (if you want to, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind: "Even though I suffer from social anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Read: Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness: A Self-Help Guide Using Cognitive Behavioral Techniques by Gillian Butler, & Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach Client Workbook (Treatments That Work) by Debra A. Hope, Richard G. Heimberg, Harlan A. Juster, and Cynthia L. Turk. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more along such lines is at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/e.html about social anxiety. At Amazon.com enter "social anxiety; CD, & VHS" See http://www.wikihow.com/Special:GoogSearch?cx=016562026678751929112%3Aohfdgqnedms&cof=FORID%3A10&ie=UTF-8&q=shyness&siteurl=www.wikihow.com%2FMain-Page#1254 Those with $: up to 6 months of CBT, and group therapy with similar sufferers is recommended. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ STRESS: A certain level of stress is unavoidable, in modern society, so it is a good idea to develop effective coping methods. Try placing your fingertips 2 cm, or 3/4 inch above both eyes, apply moderate pressure, and rub for a short time. Repeat as necessary. Also at work, you could use the aromatherapy vial, and/or EFT* shown. Use the Progressive Muscle Relaxation* in breaks, and relaxation techniques before, and after work. Light to moderate daily exercise combats stress. For some people, it helps to visualise a quiet, relaxing scene (imagine, as vividly as you can, that you are on a tropical beach, reclining comfortably; you luxuriate, as the the sun warms you, and a gentle breeze caresses your skin lightly, inhaling the tangy, sea scented, salt laden spray from the sparkling, translucent, aqua waves, crashing on the white, coral beach sand, and feeling the hot sand slip through your fingers in one hand, sipping your favorite drink with the other; all the while, the seagulls call, swoop and cavort playfully overhead in a cloudless, azure sky: you feel just like one of them, free to soar and cartwheel, or just glide in the heavy, humid air, and that this moment will last forever). Go to: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/meditation/MM00623 & http://www.healthjourneys.com/free_audio.asp & www.meditainment.com/stress-buster & http://www.freehypnosistreatment.com/meditationtreatment.html & http://www.meditainment.com/free-meditation-content & www.healthjourneys.com which are all free. Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily; (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or its FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it.
See: Mercola.com SEARCHBAR: "krill oil". The supplement DHEA is thought to counter the stress hormone, Cortisol. Ginseng & Lady's Slipper are recommended herbal remedies. Progressive Muscle Relaxation * http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html can be learned quickly, and takes only several minutes Also: http://www.mindtools.com/smpage.html & http://relaxationemporium.com/ & http://tinyurl.com/29so4u & at www.lessons4living.com there is an audio demonstration. At Amazon.com there are: "sounds of the ocean", & "ambient rain sound", & "mountain river sounds" via the searchbar. You could repeat: "I feel calm" and/or "I can handle this.", or employ the EFT * version for use in public, for which you can reasonably claim that you have a headache, as you use the acupressure massage/tapping on your temples, but it may be advisable to restrict yourself to subvocalising (saying it to yourself, in your mind, not aloud). "Even though I sometimes suffer from stress, I deeply and completely accept myself". www.mercola.com searchbar: "EFT", & "EFT therapists" or www.tapping.com (13 free videos) - professional is best. Practise a daily relaxation method, such as http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or www.wikihow.com/Meditate or Yoga Nidra, (a series of easy mental exercises only; no flexibility required) on page L at 8m.com, below, or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Options: A massage (at least neck and shoulders) with jasmine, lavender, juniper, and/or bergamot, or German chamomile essential oils added to the massage oil, and to a warm bath, preferably beforehand, to help make any tension knots and muscles more pliant (others may only want, say, a sandalwood & juniper, mix; check first).
Aromatherapy: http://www.aromaweb.com & http://www.aromatherapy.com/essentialoils & http://www.naturesgift.com/infomenu.htm & http://www.naturaltherapypages.com.au and/or long, stretching yoga exercises, or T'ai Chi. 85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/m.html To relieve stress, and tension, allow your head to drop down slowly as far as it will go, then very slowly rotate it, (without turning your face to the left, or right) keeping at maximum extension all the way. Then go back the opposite way; TAKE YOUR TIME! Repeat as necessary. ~~~ Strong heat, applied to essential oils can damage them, so don't use a diffuser. Also consider anise, basil, bay, eucalyptus, peppermint, rose, or thyme, putting some pieces of rock salt in a small vial, then add a few drops of the oil of your choice (the rock salt absorbs the oil and is less risky to carry around than a bottle of oil). opening the vial and breathing in the scent whenever you need a quick stress release. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TIRED/LACK ENERGY: If waking tired, after adequate sleep time, my 2 top suspects are * & ** Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily. They should be certified as being free of mercury, and if containing vitamin E, it should be shown as from a natural source; otherwise it is synthetic: avoid it! Consume with an orange, or its freshly squeezed juice, or another good antioxidant. Consider taking a 100% natural vitamin B complex, daily. Exercise moderately daily. Ginseng reputedly boost energy levels. DO NOT USE IF DIABETIC! See http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-lifestyle-guide/supplement-guide-ginseng & http://www.livestrong.com/article/59753-herbs-tiredness/ Have a high protein breakfast of fish, or eggs and possibly bacon within an hour of arising; they provide a lasting energy boost; no carbohydrates for 2 hrs, or extremely little. I note with interest that the Beijing Olympic decathlon gold medalist had scrambled eggs for breakfast. www.radiantrecovery.com refers. Most people in modern society today eat a poor diet, with far too much processed foods, contributing to lack of energy, depression, and anxiety. Eat more in accordance with your "nutritional type":- ( 20 question quiz http://www.naturalhealthcoach.com/tools ) or at www.mercola.com Also enter "ubiquinol" (a more usable form of CoQ10) & vitamin B12". See http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2003/06/07/iron-deficiency.aspx & http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2008/12/16/my-one-hour-vitamin-d-lecture-to-clear-up-all-your-confusion-on-this-vital-nutrient.aspx
Minimise/eliminate consumption of highly processed foods, particularly grain products, such as white bread, donuts, cake, cookies/biscuits, or anything with sugar. Opt for more wholefoods, non-starchy vegetables (especially broccoli, and spinach, with lemon, or vinegar), and fruit. Have a medical checkup, (thyroid function, adrenals*, etc. Google: "thyroid; Armour" Check out: www.stopthethyroidmadness.com & www.realthyroidhelp.com & http://www.peertrainer.com/LoungeCommunityThread.aspx?ForumID=1&ThreadID=40858 & www.feelingfff.com ) including blood tests, for low iron levels, blood glucose levels, etc. Many people in Western countries are lacking in vitamins & minerals, such as zinc, magnesium, and calcium, & vitamin D3. Take at least 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, (high in E.P.A.) or the recommended dose of a high quality of fish oil daily, like Carlsons, or Melrose: (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or its FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it! Females may benefit by balancing the DHA, & EPA versions of Omega 3 in fish, or krill** oil with ALA flaxseed oil Omega 3, or at least one heaped tablespoonful of ground flaxseed, daily. Vegetarians: Google: "Omega 3; algae; supplies" and use with flaxseed. Use the www.mercola.com ** SEARCHBAR. Dr. John Cannell of http://vitaminDcouncil.org advises that the co-factors most often deficient in the American diet, and necessary to optimise its absorption, and utilisation are magnesium, zinc, boron, and vitamin K2 ( http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2011/03/26/the-delicate-dance-between-vitamins-d-and-k.aspx ). I recommend using either health food/vitamin stores, or Googling: " ... ; supplies" rather than risking any old, or substandard products at supermarkets, or even on pharmacy shelves. Another possibility is that you may be developing Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Check this out at: www.mayoclinic.com See: http://www.collectivewizdom.com/FoodsThatHelpYouReduceStress.html and manage stress by practicing one of the following, daily: www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm or www.wikihow.com/Meditate and/or Tai Chi, Qi Gong, or yoga. Females may benefit by balancing the DHA, & EPA versions of Omega 3 in krill oil with ALA flaxseed oil Omega 3, or at least one heaped tablespoonful of ground flaxseed, daily.